Wednesday, April 6, 2016

TOP 15 Children's Books Never to be Published

These are stories that should be on the shelves of the schools and libraries because parents don't want to be parents anymore. You're welcome. 

I need someone to do the cover art for these. Any takers??

1.            My Daddy's in Jail Because he Touched Me

2.            What to do When Your Imaginary Friend Goes into Rehab

3.            So You Want to Join A Gang?

4.            The Little Penis that Couldn't

5.            My First Prostitute

6.            When Good Beer Goes Bad

7.            Dr. Seuss Shit in My Hat

8.            The Jungle Juice Book

9.            Superfudge, Highway of Love

10.          Clifford, the Big Engorged Liver

11.          Dick in Jane's Sphincter

12.          Earning Your Red Wings: A Dot to Dot Coloring Book

13.          "A" is for Anus

14.          Kleo the Chlamydia Ridden Koala

15.          Poop Schutes and Ladders  (Okay, it's a game.  So what?)


  1. You need more funny pictures.

    Dammit Self I KNOW!!!

  2. Good work. Let's get these kids out of the bubble wrap and dealing with these important topics. The younger the better.

  3. Thanks Don. My thoughts exactly. Sorry it took so long to get back to ya. I suck.....


The Ten Minutes I was Pregnant.

Okay, so as the title reads, I was 'pregnant' for 10 minutes...but unlike most women who are happy to show off their bun in the oven...